Wednesday, December 31, 2008

Insight Bowl Running Diary

We're stealing an idea from The Sports Guy and doing a running diary of thoughts during the Gopher game as Jeff and I sit and watch the game. We'll switch off as we go.

-Kansas: one play. ONE F'ING PLAY!?!?! You've got to be kidding me. Is this Iowa all over again? I think I'm going to be sick. Yep, I just threw up a little bit in my mouth. Why did Theret bite on that route? Where's my beer?

-Brewster wasn't kidding when he said Pittman would be involved. Beautiful throw to Decker. And on the next play, there's that power running game by Tim Davis... I-formation, Weber under center and two TE's... and how about that? A TD by a fullback? What is a fullback? Did anyone else not know that we had one of those?

-"Big Play" Traye isn't starting? Did anyone else not know this? Disciplinary reasons?

-Eric Decker is back baby!!! And it looks like Weber's confidence came back with him.

-Who the heck is

- The Defense is getting SOOOOO close to getting to Reesing... this could be very interesting if they actually start to get to him.

-What is with the late hit by Small? That had nothing to do with being aggressive and everything to do with being stupid. That play set up a Kansas TD on a fade route on the next play.

-Gophers go 3 & out on the next series... shades of the last 1/3 of the season.

-ANOTHER late hit on the punt? I feel sick again. Or is that thirst?

-Meier... is... KILLING US!!! We're getting through the line of scrimmage, but Reesing is finding Meier or Sharp everytime.

-Penalties are killing us right now too... and some of these calls seem to be a bit phantom to me.

-Can someone please explain to me why we aren't double-teaming Briscoe?

-Holy crap, this game seemed a lot more promising in the first quarter. The offense has really stalled in the second quarter, and the defense is having a lot of trouble getting to Reesing, which means he has time to throw. This sucks.

-Our pass blocking is horses*#t. I'm switching to bourbon.

-I've been saying this all year, but Weber becomes a much better decision maker on throws when he rolls outside of the pocket.

-A blocked punt... a fricking blocked punt? Somebody shoot me.

- Jeffrick here at halftime. Great start to the game. A totally different Gopher team than we'd seen all season. How bout that I-formation? I don't know about you, but I really enjoyed the new Gopher offense- for the two series that it lasted. Now it's right back to that old Gopher team we've come to know and love through November. It makes me want to drink- well drink more than I already have been. Also, what would it take to get a double-team on Desmond "Donnie Brasco" Brisco of Kansas? The guy has seven catches at the half for like 943000 yards. Anytime he's been in single coverage, he's caught the ball. Alright then, time for the second half- hopefully it gets better.

- Mmmmmm Jermo just served up some rye. The second half is better already.

- Is it me, or does MikeMayock do a good job as an analyst? He watches a ton of film, and doesn't just point out the obvious like Madden, but tells you WHY the last play happened and what the teams were trying to do.

- Whoops I blinked and missed the Gophs first series. 3 and out? Good to see Brewster's halftime speech really got through tothe offense.

- Brewster apparently did NOT get the memo about Brisco. Thrown to twice in single coverage, and what do ya know- 2 completions! I know, I was as shocked as you were.

- Another long completion for Kansas. Honeslty, I'm half in the bag already, and yet even I know the Gophs need to switch tactics, because whatever they're trying to do is not working. If you're trying to get pressure and can't, does it make too much sense to drop 8? Oh, and I can't remember if I mentioned this, but doubling Brisco would be a good idea.

-I generally hate sideline reporters, and think they serve no purpose. Before this game my expection to this rule was Erin Andrews.I might have to add NFL Network's Lindsy Soto as my second exception. She's easy on the eyes, and a nice distraction from how Minnesota is playing right now.

-FUMBLE!!!!! The Gophs force a punt and then give it right back running a shotgun draw that I thought we had gotten away from with the new line coach. I don't care what the calendar says, it still feels like November.

- First play, option pass, touchdown to Brisco!!! Is it bad when as soon as Meyer gets the ball I'm yelling "PASS! PASS! PASS!" and yet nobody covers Bricso downfield? I mean if I can see it happening, why can't the defense?!? Jer just got up in disgust to get another rye. The only good thing that's happened in the last 5 minutes.

- Apparently the NFL Network doesn't think things are bad enough right now for Gopher fans, because coming out of commercial break they decided to show the highlights from the Gophs loss to Texas Tech the last time they were in the Insight Bowl. Thanks for that.

- Hey the refs finally called a penalty on Kansas! Good to know they're cheaters too! Makes it first and goal from the two. Really need a TD here to have a shot....AND right on schedule the Gophs are called for a false start. Minnesota have shot themselves in the foot so many times they're out of toes.

- 1st and goal- no. 2nd and goal- no. 3rd and goal- no. 4th and goal? Let's just say I'm not holding my breath. Timeout means a rye break.

- This Keystone Light commercial is funny. I love how in beer commercials average dudes like me get really, really hot girls. I've drank Keystone Light before and I can tell you, that does not happen. Truth in advertising my ass.

- I'll give you three guesses what happened on 4th and goal. Seriously, take your time and think about it....ready? You got it- nope again! The QB sneak from 2 yards out was NOT a good call.

- Gophers force a 3 and out. On 3rd down, Brisco gives a two-handed shove to Big Play Traye Simmons to create space. Offensive pass intereference? Of course not. What would a receiver have to do to get offensive PI called? If Brisco had a gun in his pants like Plaxico but shot the receiver instead of his own leg, would that be enough?

- With a lack of African American head coaches in college football, it looks like Minnesota is trying something new to get their own black coaches more exposure- bright yellow shirts. Seriously, the Gophs' black coaches are wearing bright yellow while everyone else is in white. It's definitely working because I've noticed them.

- Jeremy here, back to complain during the 4th quarter... they just flashed Weber's stats: 13-22 for 130 yards... it's the 4th quarter, this isn't good. But you know what is good... bourbon, you probably knew that was coming.

-Hey, how about that? The refs called a PI on a Kansas defender who was covering Jack Simmons. Didn't see that coming.

-This just in: the offensive line? Not that good. The running game? Not improved?

-Hey, TD pass to Eric Decker... that's guy is pretty good isn't he? You know what else is good? You get the idea... but it helps with stomaching this game. I have I mentioned that I want to puke? I want to puke.

-11:45 left in the game and it just occured to me that the Gophs haven't gotten a turnover yet... unless you count the garbage time just before the half that we intercepted... but Jeff and I have already decided that one didn't count.

-You know who loves Kansas? The refs. They love them.

-The Gophs are starting this drive pretty much in their own endzone... this should be fun.

-Jeff just said this (and he is right) "Why are we running a QB draw on 3rd & 17?"

-There are 4 minutes left in this game, the Gophs are down by 14, and I'm already trying to figure out how we are going to break down this game. Here's the thing, obviously we knew if they won that would be huge. If they kept it close, we'd be happy. Right now we are down by 2 TD's and it feels like a blowout. Except for the 1st Q, Kansas has dominated every aspect of this game.

-I haven't been keeping track of stats for this game online because we're watching it about 30 minutes delayed on the DVR... but I'm wondering if I'm going to possibly feel worse once I actually see them. Now I'm wondering if that is even possible.

-Reesing just ran for a first down and brought the ball inside the Gophers 1o... and with that play, I don't think seeing the stats could make me feel worse about this game.

-But you know what could make me feel worse? Jake Sharp scoring a touchdown on the next play. Have I already asked to be shot? Have I already mentioned that I feel sick? Have I mentioned the puking a little bit in my mouth (which has happened at least a dozen times during this game)?

-Remember in the Iowa game when we said that Troy Stoudemire was the lone ray of hope? He's also been a ray of hope in this game. Which is just... no comfort whatsoever.

-Adam Weber looks completely uncomfortable... Jeff calls it happy feet... I call it "I want to die."

-Kansas wins 42-21. Happy New Year Gopher fans... let the drinking begin... or in our case, continue.

1 comment:

cappszilla said...

I wish you guys could have been there. I enjoyed reading the play-by-play.